6 minute read
by Bethany Rees

When Good Intentions Turn Into Self-Reliance

Setting New Year’s resolutions be like: “For I know the plans I have for me,” declares myself, “plans to check everything off of my to-do list, plans to accomplish the goals I set for myself while doing it in my own strength.”

Ok, maybe that selfish play on Jeremiah 29:11 may be a little much. BUT… am I wrong that most of us decide on a resolution or goal and then work towards it without ever asking God to take the lead in making and keeping that resolution? 

For example, I have pretty lofty health and work goals for the year, so I of course developed an organized daily routine to help me keep making progress. Then came … dun dun dunnnn … the laundry soap incident. 

The Plan Was Working… Until It Wasn’t

On day 1 of implementing my new plan, I went grocery shopping and noticed the laundry soap was majorly discounted, so I bought four containers. (Save my family money by being a frugal shopper…✅)

By day number 4 of me cruising along with my daily plan, playing my best version of high achiever, I went to start a load of laundry before I went to work. As I pushed start on the machine, I looked on the floor and saw a massive pool of laundry soap.

But wait, there’s more. To my horror, that extra laundry soap I bought was lying on its side in the cabinet above my washing machine. The lid wasn’t tightened on it, so it leaked down the shelves, down the wall, and onto a card table and chairs that I store beside my washing machine. 

Nine Hours, Kitty Litter, and a Check on My Heart

I spent the next 9 hours cleaning up that mess. I went through several rounds of cat litter, baking soda, vinegar mopping, and hand-drying everything. 

I had a plan for the day and that day was absolutely ruined, or was it? 

As I was gagging over being hands-and-knees in the kitty litter (note to self: buy scented next time), I was angry that my plans were ruined. 

From Control to Surrender

But over those next 9 hours, God got a hold of my heart. He put me in a very humbling situation (nasty smells and manual labor) to remind me that I had started my year off in the heart posture of self-seeking control...

“For I know the plans I have me,” declares myself, “plans to check everything off of my to do list, plans to accomplish the goals I set for myself while doing it in my own strength.”

...when where I needed to be was in the heart posture of surrender: 

“Show me your ways, Lord, teach me your paths. Guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior, and my hope is in you all day long” (Psalm 25:4-5).

And God showed me the error of my heart posture by leading me through a wilderness kind of day where things were beyond my control. 

Why God Uses Wilderness Moments/Seasons

But I am so thankful that God is too good to leave me in my “control-it-all” state of heart and mind. He is so good to provide a wilderness that I must walk through so that I learn to lean on Him. 

Experiencing a wilderness can mean a lot of different things for different people. 

The essence of the concept of a wilderness is that it is uncontrolled, pathless, and confusing. In other words, if you and I find ourselves in a situation beyond our control where we don’t have the resources to navigate it or survive it—then you and I would be in a “wilderness.” 

My story above is an example of just a day, but I've lived through wilderness seasons that lasted years too (you can learn more about one of those wilderness seasons in my book Leadership on the Rocks.)

However, I've come to learn that experiencing a wilderness day or season is nothing to dread. God places them in our lives to humble us, test us, and to grow our faith and character.

“Remember how the Lord your God led you all the way in the wilderness these forty years, to humble and test you in order to know what was in your heart, whether or not you would keep his commands” (Deuteronomy 8:2)

(My internal dialogue after reading that scripture: "Dear Lord, please don't give me a wilderness that lasts 40 years. I vow to be a quick learner. Amen.")

Learning to Let God Lead—Even in the Mess

Without wilderness seasons, we begin to lean on our own strength and forget our daily need for His provision in all things. 

From those minor laundry soap inconveniences that seem to ruin our plans to those seasons of life that feel hopeless, God is at the forefront of each one. He is calling us to look at Him in it and let Him lead us through it. 

So the next time you experience a wilderness inconvenience or a wilderness season, ask God to reveal sin and to grow your faith and character as He leads you through it. 

Know Better. Do Better. Live Better. Grow Through the Wilderness Experience.

Rocks Before Sand!

P.S. If we're willing, God allows us to learn a lesson once so that we never repeat the same mistake twice: My husband fixed the shelves so the laundry soap will never lay on its side again. 🤣

Scripture: 

“Remember how the Lord your God led you all the way in the wilderness these forty years, to humble and test you in order to know what was in your heart, whether or not you would keep his commands.” ~ Deuteronomy 8:2

Theme Song: 

Brandon Heath - "See Me Through It" (Official Lyric Video)

 References Used:

Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV® Copyright ©1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.® Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.